22

I don't know what to do
confused and alone again
is there something new?
Why can't I belong
not even between right or wrong?
Why am I here?
I know I'm not always wrong
but it seems that I could never do things right
What am I living for?
I see people dying everyday
at times like these how I envy them
Wishing that it was me instead
I don't give a damn of how many will grieve over me
coz I'm pretty sure there's none
they'd even be glad that I'm gone
I'm perplexed by the way things work
I'm neither even careful nor cautious
In fact I am careless
Why is accident trying to avoid me?
while I invite it openly
If I'm not such a chicken shit
I would have drawn that knife
straight through my heart
thrusting it deep until I bleed to death
and never would have reached twenty-two.